humor – Page 66 – FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER!

Tattoos!

March 22, 2020March 21, 2020 Posted in athletes, best, butterflies, California, dancing, dogs, family, friends of friends, generation, humor, memoir, mom, music, relationships, skin, tattoos, worstLeave a comment

I look around and see athletes with tattoos, ex-military people with tattoos, mothers of small children with tattoos . . .

The Tree Whisperer

March 19, 2020March 19, 2020 Posted in California, gardeners, gardening, helpful strangers, humor, memoir, nature, outdoors, relationships, trees, worstLeave a comment

(re-run) I walk my neighborhood once or twice most days while walking Dog A and Dog B (I can’t walk them together since the newest little weirdo is nuts). Because I am a tree hugger and have planted more than sixty trees at my various houses over the years, I will free a distressed tree… Continue reading The Tree Whisperer

Forget Toilet Paper – I Need Chocolate

March 19, 2020March 18, 2020 Posted in California, chocolate, Coronavirus, Costco, Covid 19, desert island, humor, parking lot, shelter in place, toilet paper1 Comment

Last week I tried to go to Costco. I got there at 8:50 a.m. and the line to the front door was a block long. Because of Coronavirus. I turned around and left. Today, the second day of our shelter-in-place order, I ventured to Costco at 4:00 p.m. after a stealth visit with my sister… Continue reading Forget Toilet Paper – I Need Chocolate

The Upside of Self-quarantining — Is There One?

March 18, 2020March 18, 2020 Posted in 401K, California, Caltrans, Coronavirus, doctor, dogs, extrovert, hair color, hair dye, humor, make-up, Medicare, memoir, nursing home, party, ski resorts, skiing, social distancing, socializing, symphony, thrift store2 Comments

I have a science friend who used the term social distancing a month ago. I listened to her. I thought of my sis in a nursing home situation, the sister I visit daily, and thought to myself, I need to do this. Two weekends ago, I skipped a Motown review at a large theater and… Continue reading The Upside of Self-quarantining — Is There One?

The Robin and the Chrome Bowl

March 18, 2020 Posted in birds, brain, California, caregiver, dogs, humor, nature, peace, relationshipsLeave a comment

(re-run) Every morning, as I sit at my kitchen table putting up my blog post and sipping on strong tea, a robin comes near the back porch to meet its reflection in an upside-down chrome dog bowl. The robin does a little dance in front of the bowl. The reflection does a dance back to… Continue reading The Robin and the Chrome Bowl

Memphis Sugar Mama

March 15, 2020March 14, 2020 Posted in car salesman, college, dating, flirting, France, humor, liquor store, Memphis, mom, pick-up lines, relationships, romance, sugar mamaLeave a comment

(re-run) After Robert’s family came to America, Robert went to college in Memphis. He met an older woman, Devon, in a liquor store. She had on a mink jacket and asked him out right there amongst the bottles of high-end scotches. She looked good for her age. She drove a Cadillac since her daddy had… Continue reading Memphis Sugar Mama

Having his Cake

March 14, 2020March 13, 2020 Posted in California, cheater, dating, dogs, firsts, flirting, humor, memoir, pick-up lines, relationships, restaurantLeave a comment

(re-run) We sat at the bar at Il Vecchio’s next to the guy with the shaved head. My girlfriend chatted him up while we waited for a table. We decided to have dinner at the bar. Adam was cute enough but not too tall. He seemed interested in my petite girlfriend, so at the end… Continue reading Having his Cake

How to Self-quarantine in California

March 13, 2020March 13, 2020 Posted in 401K, airplane, Boomers, California, coffee, Coronavirus, Costco, drive-through, germs, hand sanitizer, humor, Iowa, memoir, public bathrooms, robot, scientist, self-checkout, social distancingLeave a comment

The Corona virus Covid-19 is upon us. We need to practice social distancing, especially if we are old. I am doing my darnedest to distance myself. My plan today was to be at Costco at 9:00 a.m. to get a few things. 100 people beat me to it. I saw the line at the door… Continue reading How to Self-quarantine in California

A Day with No Makeup

March 11, 2020March 10, 2020 Posted in aging, Boomers, Costco, Facebook, humor, Uncategorized1 Comment

(re-run) I spent the early part of the morning drinking my fake coffee mocha and checking Facebook. I left in plenty of time to get to my exercise class. As I was driving down the freeway I glanced into the rear view mirror and screamed. Aagh! I’d forgotten to put on my makeup! If I… Continue reading A Day with No Makeup

My Fake-Coffee Half Hour

March 8, 2020March 7, 2020 Posted in blog, blog posts, coffee, Diet Coke, Facebook, GERD, humor, memoir, names, relationships, Spanish, Spanish class, stomach, stomach issues, wine2 Comments

It’s funny how a person’s perception of what is good changes with the circumstances. I used to look forward to my can of Diet Coke every day until I reached my mid-forties. Then the stuff was too hard on my stomach, and I gave it up. I used to look forward to my cup of… Continue reading My Fake-Coffee Half Hour