Horseback Riding on a First Date

(re-run) Juan met two women one night while dancing in a bar. He had a matchbook with one of the Donna’s phone numbers on it and another matchbook with the other Donna’s name and number on it. He couldn’t remember which was which, so he picked a matchbook and called. “Hi, this is Juan. Are… Continue reading Horseback Riding on a First Date

Hold the Crunch

(re-run) Jim’s job was to put the crunch in the new peanut butter, Jif. One machine chopped the peanuts into slivers, and another machine used pistons to plug the slivers into the creamy product. Jim also had to taste test peanut butter that had been sitting on a shelf for three months in 100 degree… Continue reading Hold the Crunch

Prom Be Gone

(re-run)  It was supposed to be junior prom at Stoughton High, but it got cancelled (thirteen years before the movie Footloose). Patsy wasn’t going steady with anyone, so she wasn’t too upset. At the last minute the school arranged a dance in the high school gym, but with no decorations, no court (no prom queen),… Continue reading Prom Be Gone

Fleet Week and the $10,000,000 Lot

When I moved to the Bay Area, no one explained what Fleet Week was. But after many years, I finally figured it out — big ships, military stuff, the Blue Angels. The Blue Angels are six military jets that fly in formation by some amazing pilots. They fly over the city of San Francisco for… Continue reading Fleet Week and the $10,000,000 Lot

The Grass is Always Greener

(re-run) I had a meeting tonight with two girlfriends in solid hard-core relationships. One is married, the other is living with her guy. My relationship is with two roommates who fight a lot over squeaky toys and over who gets to go out the door first. They are roommates of the furry kind. So imagine… Continue reading The Grass is Always Greener

DUI Date

(re-run) Lesley was a college freshman at UOP in Stockton when a big football player type guy asked her on a date. Lesley had already met his roommate, so she thought she was safe with Chad and said yes. Chad took Lesley to a party, but when his roommate came up to say hi to… Continue reading DUI Date

Pavlov’s Perfume

(re-run) My girlfriend, who shall remain nameless, lest someone recognize her on this page, has a three-time rescue dog like mine. Hers also started out as a voluntary surrender puppy after his owner first lost a home in the Redding fire. Or possibly he was at the Redding shelter and got shipped out to make… Continue reading Pavlov’s Perfume

Almost Toast

(re-run) Marlene and her friend Beth came out to California from New Hampshire after college to work for Bank of America. They each made a new friend, and each new friend brought another friend to the party (plus one more) until they were a group of seven recent college graduates, living in the city of… Continue reading Almost Toast

Must Be a Small Town

(re-run) I went to my favorite beach town for 24 hours to get away from it all. The weather was foggy, the weeds in my yard were thick, and my two dogs were fighting.  But three thrift stores in Carmel had their end-of-the-month half-off sales yesterday, so who cared about the weather, the weeds and… Continue reading Must Be a Small Town