Trudy worked at an engineering firm. Joe was the visiting copy machine repair man, or as her office mates called him, the Xerox guy. One day Trudy had to make copies. Joe was at the machine, repairing away. “Oh,” she said. “No copies for me!” “Hey there,” Joe said. “We should catch dinner sometime.” “Okay.”… Continue reading Moon Over Lafayette
The Blond-tourage
(re-run) Every woman over fifty gets the same advice from her hairdresser — to lighten up her hair. As our skin fades and our looks do, too, we need brighter lipstick, sparkly-er clothing and blonder locks to stay looking as young as we can. My apologies to women of color; this may not apply to… Continue reading The Blond-tourage
Virtual Tip Jar Fail
I love live music, and the pandemic has made it harder to find. Some of the local bands have gone online, putting out their virtual tip jar while they play for an hour or two. Sometimes they are sponsored by a business, sometimes they do it from their apartments. I love the Beatles, so when… Continue reading Virtual Tip Jar Fail
The Uses for a Nine Year Old
My Girl Friday (who works for me on Mondays) has a daughter, who sometimes comes along with her to work. Now that her daughter is nine, she is useful in many ways. 1. She entertains my dogs. 2. She entertains my sister, giving her someone to watch. 3. She brings music into the house, since… Continue reading The Uses for a Nine Year Old
A 4th of July to Remember, or Not
(re-run) It wasn’t a typical 4th of July. I was getting divorced, and I had a boyfriend, although he was a conspiracy theorist. If you don’t believe me, you could just look at his wardrobe. He owned a collection of t-shirts that screamed, I am anti-government, anti-media, anti-logic of any kind. But he was cute,… Continue reading A 4th of July to Remember, or Not
The Thrill Gene
Because two climbers scaled the Empire State Building today . . . (re-run) I have never liked roller coasters. I puke on the teacups ride. I don’t like to dive, and I brake hard on steep hills on my bicycle. I have figured out that I don’t have the thrill gene. Of my three children,… Continue reading The Thrill Gene
Uncle Frank and the Jar of Coins
(re-run) I grew up with three uncles: one in Colorado, another on the other side of the state, and one near my home town in Des Moines, Iowa. Uncle Frank was older than the other uncles, but since his daughter, Nina, was my age, I hardly noticed. He was married to my grandma’s younger sister. … Continue reading Uncle Frank and the Jar of Coins
Kuma, the Teddy-bear Akita
(re-run) Beth’s husband had two Akitas. She wanted to get one for their six-year-old son. She got Lee a puppy and named him Kuma, which is Japanese for Bear. The two older dogs kept attacking the puppy. The marriage wasn’t going well, either. Beth and her son moved out and got their own place and… Continue reading Kuma, the Teddy-bear Akita
Massage Talk, Otter Card, and Scavenger Find
(re-run) Every other Tuesday I treat myself to a full-hour massage at my chiropractor’s office. Curtis is awesome. He can make this senior citizen feel almost 50 again. Curtis asks lots of questions while he is working on my sore body parts. For the past several months I haven’t been able to talk, have barely… Continue reading Massage Talk, Otter Card, and Scavenger Find
Belly-up Beetle
(re-run) Curtis drove the Volkswagen, 1969 vintage Beetle. Smoking George, his wing man, brought the weed. They’d met their dates at a party. Stacy and Camille went to San Leandro High. Curtis and George went to Castro Valley. Curtis liked Camille. George got Stacy. They all partied at a friend of a friend’s house in… Continue reading Belly-up Beetle
The Day my Dog Herded Me to the ER
(re-run) Way back when, I had two children and a rare free day. The kindergartener was going on an all-day field trip. The two-year-old was going to daycare for the day. I had hours ahead of me to do all the yard work and gardening that I could squeeze in. I put on some old… Continue reading The Day my Dog Herded Me to the ER
Grizzly Bear!
(re-run) An Amazon robot punctured a can of Bear Mace, sending 80 employees to the hospital before Christmas. It reminded me of this true account as told to me at a holiday party by a friend’s daughter’s boyfriend’s father figure. His name is Bob. In 2008 you take your wife, Liza, and your teen-aged kids… Continue reading Grizzly Bear!
Staying Fit without a FitBit
(re-run) Today, before and after Zumba class on Zoom, the ladies were discussing how many steps we take during one class and how many calories we burn. This went on for a while, and I signed off. I don’t need a gadget to tell me if I am getting enough exercise. I have dogs. They… Continue reading Staying Fit without a FitBit
Michael Jackson’s Impact
(re-run) I was a teenager when Michael Jackson became a household name. He was a stand-out in his brothers’ band, the Jackson Five. He was ten years old when he sang ABC, simple as 1 – 2- 3, Girl, I love you! I watched MJ grow up. I bought his first solo album, Off the… Continue reading Michael Jackson’s Impact
FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER! 