Do the Hustle

(re-run) Guido met Marsha at a famous bar called Rex and Eric’s in Waikiki. He lived locally. She was on vacation. He’d put on his five gold chains, unbuttoned his billowy polyester shirt with the big collar to reveal just enough chest hair, stepped into a pair of black high-waisted pants that hugged his tight… Continue reading Do the Hustle

Horseback Riding on a First Date

(re-run) Juan met two women one night while dancing in a bar. He had a matchbook with one of the Donna’s phone numbers on it and another matchbook with the other Donna’s name and number on it. He couldn’t remember which was which, so he picked a matchbook and called. “Hi, this is Juan. Are… Continue reading Horseback Riding on a First Date

Prom Be Gone

(re-run)  It was supposed to be junior prom at Stoughton High, but it got cancelled (thirteen years before the movie Footloose). Patsy wasn’t going steady with anyone, so she wasn’t too upset. At the last minute the school arranged a dance in the high school gym, but with no decorations, no court (no prom queen),… Continue reading Prom Be Gone

Staying Fit without a Fitbit

(re-run) Today, before and after Zoom Zumba, the ladies were discussing how many steps we take during one class and how many calories we burn. This went on for a while, and I signed off. I don’t need a gadget to tell me if I am getting enough exercise. I have dogs. They need exercise… Continue reading Staying Fit without a Fitbit

Don’t Judge a Book

(re-run) Of all the pick-up lines I’ve ever heard, the best one came yesterday at the Walnut Creek Octoberfest. “Now those are some sensible shoes.” Yes, I had on one-inch-heel black booties because I was dressed as a German beer garden maid, and they were the best shoes with white knee socks. “They’re good for… Continue reading Don’t Judge a Book

The Dancing Tribe

Different town. Different band. Same faces. We are the tribe of dancers, mostly in our fifties, sixties, and seventies, following rock and roll music wherever it goes.  We might not know each other’s names, but we smile and wave. It’s been two years since some of us have seen each other. Last summer all the… Continue reading The Dancing Tribe

Late-night Loser

(re-run) We decided to meet at Bing Crosby’s. I took a seat at the bar, and asked for water. After all, I’d had two glasses of wine already, waiting for him to get off work at the TV station and to drive all the way to Walnut Creek from Marin County. I listened to the… Continue reading Late-night Loser

The Darwin Awards

(re-run) The world is insane. A snowstorm is predicted for the East Coast. It’s Mother’s Day weekend. The local news station reported that scientists may take llama antibodies for Covid-19 and give them to humans to see if it would help with immunity. Does that mean the humans might start spitting when they are angry?… Continue reading The Darwin Awards

Skin Check

“Good job!” the physician’s assistant said when I complained about my uneven fake tan. “It’s been a lifestyle change for me, staying out of the sun,” I said. “I’m proud of you,” Miss Tan said. She looked at the four spots I was worried about, froze off the two on my back, biopsied one on… Continue reading Skin Check