Chuck drove his powder blue Bonneville Pontiac to pick up his new girlfriend for their drive-in movie date his senior year of high school. He had tricked out the interior of the car with his two taxidermy quail in the car’s back window on a bed of shag carpeting. When he drove the car at… Continue reading Chuck’s Drive-in Movie Date
Month: August 2019
Dumb Dog Dad’s Doo Doo Date
Chuck had two Keeshounds named Baron and Zoe. Baron was a little bit spastic. At any rate, Chuck mentioned to a friend that he needed to find new homes for the pair, and the friend offered to take the dogs. Chuck had over half a bag of dog food left. He didn’t want to waste… Continue reading Dumb Dog Dad’s Doo Doo Date
Usually I Blog, Today I Cleaned
Company is coming. It’s amazing what that will do to a person who doesn’t put things away daily, except maybe keys and dog treats. I look around the house. It’s an utter mess. Newspapers I have yet to read, books I have yet to read, sewing I have yet to sew, clean laundry in baskets,… Continue reading Usually I Blog, Today I Cleaned
Worst Mom Ever
(re-run) As a mother, choose your words and actions carefully, for eighteen years! Mom to three grown children, I still hear about the horrible things I said and the awful things I did to them as children. Oldest daughter with her dad’s dark heavy eyebrows: me, to her as a teen, “You might want to… Continue reading Worst Mom Ever
Dating and other Things Over Fifty
Sherry didn’t get her first colonoscopy when she turned fifty. She put it off. Did she have one done at 51? No, she did not. 52? No, she did not. Finally, Sherry scheduled it to be done at 53. She was so nervous when she went in that the nurses asked Joe, a regular patient… Continue reading Dating and other Things Over Fifty
Theft of your Intellectual Property
If you are a writer, then what you write belongs to you as your intellectual property. Be careful of critique groups and the people with whom you share your work. You must have an iron-clad agreement that your work is your work, and no one else is allowed to use it. This is a sad… Continue reading Theft of your Intellectual Property
Get Some Facetime
As I stepped into the waiting room at my chiropractor’s office, three women and one guy were looking down at their cell phones, sitting in a symmetrical pattern amongst the u-shaped chairs. Feeling giddy from my fifty-five minute massage I said,” Well, this looks like a blog post to me! You’re all on your phones!”… Continue reading Get Some Facetime
The Escape Artist
When my son was born, he came out angry, two weeks early and mad as hell. “He looks like a prosecutor,” the nurses said. Fast forward two years. He wouldn’t hold my hand while walking to and from the car. He wouldn’t hold my hand in parking lots. He was always running away inside of… Continue reading The Escape Artist
A Text Dump and Surprise Lunch, Same Day
If you want to improve your dating life, I recommend dropping about thirty pounds in six months. Seriously, I don’t recommend developing the underlying issue, just achieving the weight loss. To make a long story short, a guy I met nine months ago, one who had lots of opportunities to break off whatever we had… Continue reading A Text Dump and Surprise Lunch, Same Day
Date with a Conspiracy Theorist
Charlie met Christine, a pretty blonde, on Our Time. They talked on the phone and decided to meet on a Friday afternoon at Oasis in downtown Pleasanton. After all, her profile said she lived in Pleasanton. “I live in Mountain House now,” Christine said. Charlie felt that she had misrepresented herself. Mountain House was another… Continue reading Date with a Conspiracy Theorist
FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER! 