(re-run) When I was fourteen I stole a Dilly Bar from the Dairy Queen on a dare, but it wasn’t easy. It was lunch break from my junior high school, and we had an open campus. That meant we could walk across Douglas Avenue to go to the corner drugstore for candy or the Dairy… Continue reading I Stole a Dilly Bar on a Dare
Category: Iowa
Pontoon Boat Disaster
(re-run) My parents didn’t know how to swim. When we went on vacation at Clear Lake, Iowa, and Dad wanted to take us out in a rented pontoon boat, my mom objected. Dad won in the end, and the five kids put on our life jackets. I think my mom did, too. I am sure… Continue reading Pontoon Boat Disaster
Pennies from Heaven
(re-run) When I was sixteen, I saved my babysitting money and went downtown to Cottage Grove Avenue in Des Moines, where there was a head shop filled with incense, hanging beads, roach clips, black light posters and tie dye. Although I wasn’t a pothead (I didn’t smoke cigarettes either), I enjoyed the ambience of the… Continue reading Pennies from Heaven
A Great Dane Story
(re-run) When I was almost thirteen, I hung out at my neighbor Bonnie’s house, just one block away from mine, but it was different world. Both her parents worked full time, so we teens could be there with no parental supervision. We were supervised, though, by the family’s Great Danes. I remember three dogs, but… Continue reading A Great Dane Story
My Friend, the Thief
(re-run) We took the bus to go shopping downtown. We weren’t old enough yet to drive, and it was a boring Saturday. Debbie suggested the shopping trip. We had a shopping center (before malls) within walking distance of our houses. A bus trip was more adventurous. Debbie was always up for adventure. She had moved… Continue reading My Friend, the Thief
Government Cheese and Pinto Beans
I was nine or ten when our mom took me and my younger siblings downtown to a place to get some free food for poor people. Our dad was out of work for six weeks. My mother was humiliated. We waited in line until it was our turn. As the worker handed Mom her block… Continue reading Government Cheese and Pinto Beans
Fleetwood Who?
Whenever a Fleetwood Mac song comes on, everyone around me goes gah-gah. I admit that the Rumours album is a good one, but I just don’t feel it like everyone else does. The other month, I tried to figure out why that is. At karaoke, many of my girlfriends want to sing Fleetwood Mac songs.… Continue reading Fleetwood Who?
The Day Grandma Got Woke
(re-run) My mom loves to watch the daytime talk show called Ellen. It’s usually fun and games, with hunky guys and Ellen playing tricks on her guests and staff. She rounds out the hour with lesbian jokes, a musical performance by some obscure band, and Ellen surprising some needy but giving person with $10,000 in… Continue reading The Day Grandma Got Woke
Lola Meets Ricardo
Lola met her forever husband on the first day of college at the University of Iowa. She had signed up for a speech and composition class with an emphasis on women’s studies. When she got to the classroom, there was a note on the door that the class had been moved to another building. A… Continue reading Lola Meets Ricardo
A Mouse in the Bed
(re-run) When my oldest child was in 4th or 5th grade, she told me one morning that there was a mouse in her bed. “There’s no mouse in your bed!” I said. “There is,” she said. “I felt it crawling over my leg.” She went off to school, and I told my mother, who was… Continue reading A Mouse in the Bed
FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER! 