If you want to improve your dating life, I recommend dropping about thirty pounds in six months. Seriously, I don’t recommend developing the underlying issue, just achieving the weight loss. To make a long story short, a guy I met nine months ago, one who had lots of opportunities to break off whatever we had… Continue reading A Text Dump and Surprise Lunch, Same Day
Category: humor
Lovely Rita, Meter Maid
(re-run) Saturdays are best when they are busy. I like to have things to do. So yesterday was fun from morning to night. I spent most of the day in overly-metered Walnut Creek. The town of walnut orchards has turned into a buzzing destination for shoppers. It boasts a Nordstroms, Neiman Marcus (Needless Mark-up), Tiffany,… Continue reading Lovely Rita, Meter Maid
Checking Out the Guy Checking You Out
First of all, let’s just get this out in the open. It is weird to be a woman of a certain age and to be hit on while waiting for a BART train. As in Bay Area Rapid Transit. He was sitting down when I came up to the platform. I sat down next to… Continue reading Checking Out the Guy Checking You Out
Car Shows, Men, and Elvis
It’s funny how memories of one thing lead to memories of other things happening in the same time period. Like the Twin Towers falling, or JFK getting assassinated. Or Elvis dying. Today is the anniversary of Elvis Presley’s death. Forty-two years ago, I was stepping off an airplane from Spain (by way of Morocco). I… Continue reading Car Shows, Men, and Elvis
Letting Go
My cars sit out in the summer. There’s no way they can go into the garage. Fires are burning north of here and have been for weeks. The Bay Area air is smoky. I look at the blue plastic tubs of flammable clothing and think, “It would take days for all of this to burn.”… Continue reading Letting Go
Plain Jane
My middle name is Jane. I don’t love it. There was a commercial in the 70’s for hair dye, I think. I remember the line,” Don’t be a plain Jane.” After that I disliked both my middle name and my hair color. There was another commercial in that decade that said, “Boys don’t make passes… Continue reading Plain Jane
Fighting for Blue Jeans
(re-run) When you’re in the dog house, you are in trouble. You’ve done something bad. As a child, I was never in the dog house because we didn’t have one. We didn’t even have a dog. My mother had her own strain of weird expressions that she said to us kids on a regular basis,… Continue reading Fighting for Blue Jeans
The Not So Trivial Trivia of Paul McCartney
Three years ago Philip Norman published his book, Paul McCartney: The Life. I checked it out from the library for my Sis in large print. The book is twenty-nine pages short of 1200! Sis took one look at the book and said, “It’s too heavy.” I had it in the return pile but then decided… Continue reading The Not So Trivial Trivia of Paul McCartney
There’s Bitchy and There’s Old-lady Bitchy
I could’ve called it My Bitchy Saturday but opted instead for the other title. It started off with the grocery store clerk putting my bag of apples at the bottom of the bag, then placing two dozen eggs, a pound of turkey, and a container of cake on top of them. Yes, I bought a… Continue reading There’s Bitchy and There’s Old-lady Bitchy
Bad Things that Come in Small Packages
(re-run) They met online on Okay Cupid. The horizontal happened fast. Things were going well, so after six months, Barry gave up his ugly apartment and bought a condo. She moved in right away. Then he started to notice her temper: 1. If the house wasn’t perfectly clean at all times. 2. If his son’s… Continue reading Bad Things that Come in Small Packages
