Jim’s job was to put the crunch in the new peanut butter, Jif. One machine chopped the peanuts into slivers, and another machine used pistons to plug the slivers into the creamy product. Jim also had to taste test peanut butter that had been sitting on a shelf for three months in 100 degree heat.… Continue reading Hold the Crunch
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The Double Dump
They’d met on Match. His name was Ready for Adventure. Larry chose a classy woman several weeks older than he was. “How does it feel to be a cougar?” he teased her. Julie liked nice things. She liked to dress up. Larry thought of her as the love of his life. He talked more than… Continue reading The Double Dump
Grabby Guy’s Goodness
Brenda was a grad student at Tufts in Boston. She was tired of dating and was thinking of getting her doctorate in nutrition after she got her Master’s degree. Brenda’s two roommates, who were also a couple, told Brenda she needed a night out to go dancing. Brenda got ready and then waited for them… Continue reading Grabby Guy’s Goodness
You Can Take the Girl Out of Iowa
At the end of my ten-week student teaching in Venezuela, one of the teachers said that I could probably come back to teach at Campo Alegre the following year. She said they were always looking for American teachers. “You can stay with me during the summer,” she said, “until you get your apartment.” The American… Continue reading You Can Take the Girl Out of Iowa
Designer Dogs, 200th Post
As I watch the end of the Oscars with a little dog cozied up in the chair with me and my sister asking when she can go to bed, I think back on the man I met the other night, the one who wants to get a Doodle Dane, a cross breed between a Great… Continue reading Designer Dogs, 200th Post
Door Number One or Door Number Two?
It was all because of a blizzard. Well, sort of. I wanted to go to Minnesota to see the boyfriend I’d broken up with five months before while we were in Europe. We had bought Eurail passes and had made our way across the continent, sleeping on trains, in tents, and youth hostels, even though… Continue reading Door Number One or Door Number Two?
How my Bug Collection Changed a Generation
When my new science teacher announced on the first day of 7th grade that no one would get an A in his class if they didn’t make an insect collection, I was like, “NOOOOOOOO! I hate bugs!” My mother hated bugs. Her mother hated bugs. They hated mice, snakes, and dog poop, too. I walked… Continue reading How my Bug Collection Changed a Generation
The Uses for a Nine Year Old
My Girl Friday (who works for me on Mondays) has a daughter, who sometimes comes along with her to work. Now that her daughter is nine, she is useful in many ways. 1. She entertains my dogs. 2. She entertains my sister, giving her someone to watch. 3. She brings music into the house, since… Continue reading The Uses for a Nine Year Old
Wonderful White Elephant Sale
The biggest, most organized sale I’ve ever seen is the Oakland Museum’s white elephant sale . The Oakland Museum’s Women’s Board hosts the sale in a warehouse off Fruitvale that they own outright. Parking is tough, but once you’ve found your spot, get ready to shop till you drop. The Sunday preview sale is a… Continue reading Wonderful White Elephant Sale
Dive Bar Dancing
I never imagined that I’d still be dancing in bars at this age. But hey, a girl’s got to dance, and in the winter the live music in in the bars. So here I sit, waiting for my girl friend, who is dumping her grumpy guy tonight to come dance with me. She’s got a… Continue reading Dive Bar Dancing
FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER! 