How does a sixty-year-old woman find out about an app called Grindr for gay guys? She asks her local millennial cocktail waitress at an upscale bar for a worst date story. Her waitress just happens to know her younger brother’s worst first story and tells it to her for a better tip. Here it is.… Continue reading Grindr Getaway
So This is Retirement?
I took social security early last year. Don’t buy into the hype that it’s better to wait. I won’t start losing money on my decision until I turn eighty. By then I’ll have Medicare and won’t be paying $15,000 a year for health insurance. “How’s retirement?” you ask. I am busier now than ever before.… Continue reading So This is Retirement?
Almost Toast
Marlene and her friend Beth came out to California from New Hampshire after college to work for Bank of America. They each made a new friend, and each new friend brought another friend to the party (plus one more) until they were a group of seven recent college graduates, living in the city of San… Continue reading Almost Toast
Look Up! Get Some Face Time
As I stepped into the waiting room at my chiropractor’s office, three women and one guy were looking down at their cell phones, sitting in a symmetrical pattern in a u-shaped group of chairs. Feeling giddy from my 55 minute massage I said, “Well, this looks like a blog post to me! You’re all on… Continue reading Look Up! Get Some Face Time
To Smoke or Not to Smoke
My friend Kelly hasn’t smoked a cigarette for 75 days. After thirty-seven years of the puffing habit, she is proud of herself. Chantix helped. Wanting to quit helped more. Wanting better health and to be a good role model for her kids helped the most. Kelly craves a cigarette after finishing a meal. It’s a… Continue reading To Smoke or Not to Smoke
The Elusive Dot Dot Dot . . .
It takes seven artisans to make a glass of wine — from the grape grower to the vintner, to the cooper, etc. Or so the pitch goes at the small winery near Fairfield. And to draw a crowd, it brings in live music on weekend afternoons. Brent met a woman online and invited her to… Continue reading The Elusive Dot Dot Dot . . .
Bad Things Come in Small Packages
They met online on Okay Cupid. The horizontal happened fast. Things were going well, so after six months, Barry gave up his ugly apartment and bought a condo. She moved in right away. Then he started to notice her temper: 1. If the house wasn’t perfectly clean at all times. 2. If his son’s dog… Continue reading Bad Things Come in Small Packages
Hold the Crunch
Jim’s job was to put the crunch in the new peanut butter, Jif. One machine chopped the peanuts into slivers, and another machine used pistons to plug the slivers into the creamy product. Jim also had to taste test peanut butter that had been sitting on a shelf for three months in 100 degree heat.… Continue reading Hold the Crunch
Two Bird Baths, One Fountain
I love my yard. When I first bought my fixer house on a fixer third acre, the yard was full of rocks and rose bushes. Now it has trees, plants, bushes, flag stone, one fountain and two bird baths. The fountain is an advertisement to creatures near and far to come into my fenced yard.… Continue reading Two Bird Baths, One Fountain
The Double Dump
They’d met on Match. His name was Ready for Adventure. Larry chose a classy woman several weeks older than he was. “How does it feel to be a cougar?” he teased her. Julie liked nice things. She liked to dress up. Larry thought of her as the love of his life. He talked more than… Continue reading The Double Dump
FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER! 