Aaron met Katie on Plenty of Fish. She didn’t message him back for months. For their first date, he took her duck hunting. She brought her own gun. He brought a boat and the friend who owned it. The trio didn’t’ talk much because they had to be quiet to get a duck. It was… Continue reading Buffalo Bill Meets Annie Oakley
Category: restaurant
Worst Boss Ever
Aside from the old-guy boss I had for ten days at the Iowa State Fair, who took one look at my giraffe legs in my short culottes jumper I’d made in sewing class and demanded that I bend over to see if my butt would show (it didn’t), George was the worst boss ever. George… Continue reading Worst Boss Ever
Jerky Jokester
Elena lived in the city. She went to the Cingular Wireless store to get a phone line. Fidel worked there and helped her get one set up. She filled out the paperwork and then changed her mind. He put the paperwork into the shredder but then asked her for her phone number. “If you want… Continue reading Jerky Jokester
Loneliest Study Abroad Ever
After three months in South America and six weeks of student teaching Catholic high school girls, I headed to Burgos, Spain, with 30 students and a handful of professors from Iowa State and the University of Iowa. It would be my way of earning the final credits of my dual degree. Linda, a high school… Continue reading Loneliest Study Abroad Ever
False Alarm
Donnie, a firefighter, had a date with a woman from Match.com. The date was just okay, but he knew there were only two kinds of women, those he would sleep with and those he wouldn’t. Lisa was in the first category. According to Donnie, men never had a wait-and-see attitude about a woman. Women could… Continue reading False Alarm
Having his Cake
We sat at the bar at Il Vecchio’s next to the guy with the shaved head. My girlfriend chatted him up while we waited for a table. We decided to have dinner at the bar. Adam was cute enough but not too tall. He seemed interested in my petite girlfriend, so at the end of… Continue reading Having his Cake
Grindr Getaway
How does a sixty-year-old woman find out about an app called Grindr for gay guys? She asks her local millennial cocktail waitress at an upscale bar for a worst date story. Her waitress just happens to know her younger brother’s worst first story and tells it to her for a better tip. Here it is.… Continue reading Grindr Getaway
Why Not to Discuss Politics and Religion
Steve was a grad student at UCLA while he worked for Chrysler. His roommates fixed him up on a date with a Persian beauty named Mahvash. It was love at first sight for Steve. Mahvash had long dark hair and wore a gorgeous gown that really turned him on. They went to dinner and afterward,… Continue reading Why Not to Discuss Politics and Religion
Moochy McMoocherson
It was the early 2000’s. Lynn met a cute, age appropriate guy in the wine country, Yountville, while dancing at a bar with her friends. Eric said he was also from the Bay Area, and he asked her out. She said yes. Lynn had told the neighbors about her new guy, so they were in… Continue reading Moochy McMoocherson
This Little Piggy
After college, I lived in a town with 2000 people and a bunch of pigs — real ones, the kind that grunt and poop and lift the gate latch with their noses. I saw something run past the window of my rented farmhouse. At first I thought it was a deer until I put on… Continue reading This Little Piggy
