humor – Page 86 – FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER!

The Red-tailed Hawk and the Toddler Fence

February 20, 2019February 20, 2019 Posted in birds, California, children, humor, hunting, Lindsay Wildlife Museum, memoir, Mount Diablo State Park, nature, outdoors, relationships, toddler, worst1 Comment

I am a bird lover. I feed the song birds and the finches. I have an ongoing water supply in the form of a fountain in my back yard. I’ve planted native plants for the hummingbirds. When I hike, I am thrilled to find a hawk feather to add to my hat. Twenty-odd years ago,… Continue reading The Red-tailed Hawk and the Toddler Fence

Pavlov’s Perfume

February 17, 2019February 17, 2019 Posted in animal adoption, animal rescue, animal shelter, ARF, Belgian Malinois, California, dogs, Houdini, humor, Jack Russell terrier, memoir, Pavlov, pet, relationships2 Comments

My girlfriend, who shall remain nameless, lest someone recognize her on this page, has a three-time rescue dog like me. Hers also started out as a voluntary surrender puppy after his owner first lost a home in the Redding fire. Or possibly he was at the Redding shelter and got shipped out to make room… Continue reading Pavlov’s Perfume

How to Train your Dog so He Won’t Bite You

February 15, 2019February 15, 2019 Posted in animal adoption, animal rescue, animal shelter, animal training, California, humor, memoir, pet, relationships, worstLeave a comment

Yesterday at the natural stone store where I went to look at their granite, the guy that helped me mentioned that his friend’s German Shepherd puppy kept biting his owner. Puppies do that because they are exploring their world. They are babies using everything as their personal teething rings. When my lab mix Pepper was… Continue reading How to Train your Dog so He Won’t Bite You

The Robin and the Chrome Bowl

February 14, 2019 Posted in birds, brain, California, caregiver, dogs, humor, nature, peace, relationshipsLeave a comment

(re-run) Every morning, as I sit at my kitchen table putting up my blog post and sipping on strong tea, a robin comes near the back porch to meet its reflection in an upside-down chrome dog bowl. The robin does a little dance in front of the bowl. The reflection does a dance back to… Continue reading The Robin and the Chrome Bowl

How to Relax for Bed

February 5, 2019 Posted in ASMR, best, California, cleaning, humor, ironing, laundry, memoir, relationships, relaxation, shop owner, vintageLeave a comment

I closed my online costume shop last summer. I donated 500 dresses to a charity for third world girls and sorted through my aprons, pulling out all the hostess ones, the sheer ones not for cooking. I had 150 of them. I gave them to my local thrift store, the one that knows vintage stuff.… Continue reading How to Relax for Bed

Sparking Joy, One Wine Glass at a Time

February 4, 2019February 4, 2019 Posted in contractor, humor, kitchen remodel, kitchen sink, Marie Condo, memoir, sparking joyLeave a comment

I am getting a new kitchen. My contractor is coming today to start the demo of my old one. I’ve spent the past week packing up my cabinets and the ding room hutch on the wall that is getting torn down. That’s a lot of dishes! I have enough wine glasses to have a big… Continue reading Sparking Joy, One Wine Glass at a Time

Lovely Rita, Meter Maid

February 3, 2019 Posted in Bay Area, California, dogs, friends, girl friends, humor, library, memoir, newspaper, parking, parking lot, parking ticket, thrift store1 Comment

Saturdays are best when they are busy. I like to have things to do. So yesterday was fun from morning to night. I spent most of the day in overly-metered Walnut Creek. The town of walnut orchards has turned into a buzzing destination for shoppers. It boasts a Nordstroms, Neiman Marcus (Needless Mark-up), Tiffany, Apple,… Continue reading Lovely Rita, Meter Maid

Date with a Hoarder

February 2, 2019 Posted in California, dating, dinner, doctor, hoarder, humor, relationships1 Comment

After Sue became a widow, her adult children were protective of her dating online. They had her send them a profile photo, an address, and phone number for each guy she dated. One of them was an anesthesiologist named Don. Sue’s son’s friend knew Don since he was in the medical field. Sue felt safe… Continue reading Date with a Hoarder

Daisy’s Bloody Tuesday

January 31, 2019 Posted in animal adoption, animal rescue, animal training, California, dog training, dogs, humorLeave a comment

Woe is me. I have a weirdo for a rescue dog. I am her third owner. Things go well most days, but then she growls at my bigger dog, which is usually chill with the little goofball. But sometimes the big dog goes off on the little dog growling at her. She pins down Daisy,… Continue reading Daisy’s Bloody Tuesday

Spinning a Spider Story

January 30, 2019January 30, 2019 Posted in arachnids, best, California, Carmel, firsts, holidays, humor, insects, spiders, worstLeave a comment

(re-run) My strength and toning instructor loves to tell us trivia while we work out. Last week she said spiders are the most active between 6 and 8 p.m. and that the female spiders go out looking for food at that time. The males follow. Isn’t that just like a male anyway, to wait until… Continue reading Spinning a Spider Story