It’s week ten or eleven of the Covid-19 lockdown — I’ve lost track. I found out in a Zoom meeting last night that two more people that I know had a nasty virus in March that caused them to lose their sense of smell and taste. They are both well over sixty, as are the… Continue reading You Know You’ve Been Alone Too Long When . . .
Category: humor
Four Bands and Birthdays in Four Nights
(re-run) This is now a distant memory during the Covid 19 crisis. I know summer is here when I’ve seen four live bands in four nights. The first band played in Moraga on Thursday, a bit of a drive with traffic at 5:00 p.m. Three Day Weekend had good harmony, interesting song choices and some… Continue reading Four Bands and Birthdays in Four Nights
Do You Want a Cookie, Little Girl?
(re-run) She ran a personal ad in the Contra Costa Times: Single white female looking for single Asian man. Her two previous boyfriends had been Asian. James called and left a message with his phone number on a Friday night. The next morning Pam checked her phone messages. She liked his voice as she listened… Continue reading Do You Want a Cookie, Little Girl?
Date with a Cad
(re-run) Against her better judgment Svetlana met up with a man from Match and….drum roll….he met her expectations of the Cad. A cad is a man who is aware of the codes of conduct, which separate a gentleman from a ruffian, but finds himself unable to live up to them. Cads are capable of disguising themselves as… Continue reading Date with a Cad
At Face Value
(re-run) Mark was a good-looking bartender at an upscale restaurant, and full of confidence. He’d say his face was his moneymaker and that you need to use what your mama gave you. Mark went onto Bumble to find a date. He waited until a woman messaged him (that’s how Bumble works). Her photo showed a… Continue reading At Face Value
At Face Value
(re-run) Mark was a good-looking bartender at an upscale restaurant, and full of confidence. He’d say his face was his moneymaker and that you need to use what your mama gave you. Mark went onto Bumble to find a date. He waited until a woman messaged him (that’s how Bumble works). Her photo showed a… Continue reading At Face Value
Sally’s Downward Dog Disaster
(re-run) The first Women’s March was the next day. Sally went to her friend, Lisa’s, to make a poster for the march. Several women showed up, ready to drink some wine and to think of clever sayings for their signs. Sally already had her slogan: No Uterus – No Opinion. Lisa’s cute little rescue dog,… Continue reading Sally’s Downward Dog Disaster
Letting Go
(re-run) My cars sit out in the summer. There’s no way they can go into the garage. Fires are burning north of here and have been for weeks. The Bay Area air is smoky. I look at the blue plastic tubs of flammable clothing and think, “It would take days for all of this to… Continue reading Letting Go
Butt Dials and Other My-Bads
(re-run) I had lunch with my son yesterday. We were trying to figure out why I’d used up all my storage on my cell phone. He took a look, handed back my phone, and watched me put it in my pocket. “You need to hit the button on the side and turn off your screen,”… Continue reading Butt Dials and Other My-Bads
How to Train your Puppy so He Won’t Bite You
(re-run) Yesterday at the natural stone store where I went to look at their granite, the guy that helped me mentioned that his friend’s German Shepherd puppy kept biting his owner. Puppies do that because they are exploring their world. They are babies using everything as their personal teething rings. When my lab mix Pepper… Continue reading How to Train your Puppy so He Won’t Bite You
