I am usually quick at decisions, and I am happy with them. No, I will not jump out of an airplane. No, I will not go on that upside-down roller coaster. Yes, I will dance with you. Yes, I will come to your party. Every now and then I get myself stuck between the little… Continue reading The Conflict Within
Category: humor
The Bucket List
(re-run from ?) I’d never heard the expression “bucket list” until the movie of the same name came out in 2007 with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. Since then I’ve heard people, everyone from Medicare seniors to elementary-aged kids, name things on their bucket list. I had a bucket list moment last night, although I… Continue reading The Bucket List
Always Wear Clean Underwear
I was getting ready to walk the dog this morning when I noticed that the toilet bowl needed a swish. Doing it later isn’t a thing with me. What If I get hit by a bus and people see my dirty toilet? Swish, swish. My youngest is coming home for Thanksgiving? Dust the cobwebs, vacuum… Continue reading Always Wear Clean Underwear
Watch Out for the Green Pepper
I can’t eat green pepper. I can’t eat a lot of things. The older I get, the more things I need a certain way to keep me happy. When I was four years into a past relationship, I knew it was in trouble when the boyfriend started adding green pepper to everything he served me.… Continue reading Watch Out for the Green Pepper
No Christmas Tree for Me
(re-run from 2018) Eight Christmases in this house and only two trees. Both were living, and both got planted in my yard. Guess what? My yard is full. That’s what happens when you get rid of your grass, fire your gardener, and watch volunteer trees grow on their own, self-planting trees with a little help… Continue reading No Christmas Tree for Me
Orphan Thanksgiving and the Babe Mobile
Bruce was a lieutenant in the navy, and he lived with four bachelor roommates. They’d been out to sea for six months and were back for six months. A guy could save up a lot of money in six months, so Bruce was able to buy a silver Jaguar xke convertible. He nicknamed it his… Continue reading Orphan Thanksgiving and the Babe Mobile
Poop on the Patio
(re-run) It’s been raining ever since 2023 started, pretty much nonstop. We aren’t used to this in sunny California. We’ve been in a twenty-year drought for well, twenty years. Usually Seattle gets this weather, not us. I can’t walk the dogs. I can’t work in the yard. But I can feed the critters and watch… Continue reading Poop on the Patio
Best T-shirts Ever
(re-run) A student at Sonoma High School wants to collect enough t-shirts with college logos to give a class of first generation fifth graders. Why? So they will start thinking about going to college. This is a cool idea. A writer friend, who also happens to be Latina, shared the student’s post on her Facebook… Continue reading Best T-shirts Ever
Rescue Dog Month # 7
(re-run from 2018) Daisy’s purple collar is missing. She had it on when she got up, but an hour later it is gone, along with her license and I.D. tag with my phone number on it. Where could it be? And how did it come off? I’ve walked the entire back yard and haven’t found… Continue reading Rescue Dog Month # 7
Pooping at 28,000 Feet
I’m not a great traveler. I usually can’t poop in a strange environment, or with a roommate, or in a public toilet. My bowels, you see, are shy. Peeing is not a problem. My mom used to run the water when I couldn’t pee as a kid. Now all I have to do is think… Continue reading Pooping at 28,000 Feet
FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER! 