memoir – Page 138 – FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER!

The Uses for a Ten Year Old

March 4, 2019March 4, 2019 Posted in Adirondack chairs, appraiser, beach, California, dogs, driveway, garage, math, memoir, oven, Pacific ocean, real estate taxesLeave a comment

The nine year old in my life has joined the Tweener set. She is a double digit girl now, on her way to teenager-hood. She is doing division now in math, although those pesky times tables continue to bother her. 7 x 9 is her nemesis. So is 9 x 7, 63 divided by 9,… Continue reading The Uses for a Ten Year Old

Mom, a Mouse, and the Milk

March 1, 2019March 1, 2019 Posted in memoir, meter man, milkman, mouseLeave a comment

The world is far different today than we were kids. How many generations have said the exact same thing? Cave Man: Me cold. Cave Woman: Me cold cold. Next generation: Cave man: Me cold. Me strike rock against rock. Fire! Me warm! Cave woman: Me cold. Move over! You get the idea. Every new invention… Continue reading Mom, a Mouse, and the Milk

Asparagus, Anyone?

February 25, 2019 Posted in high school, humor, memoir, nature, Nebraska, outdoors, relationships, yardLeave a comment

The farmhouse was next to the highway, close enough for me to hear the train come by every night, and far enough away from the tracks to get used to sleeping through it. No houses could be seen from any window — just trees, sky, and lots of cornfields. It was a peaceful place, sometimes… Continue reading Asparagus, Anyone?

Best Ed Sullivan Show Ever

February 24, 2019February 22, 2019 Posted in Beatles, best, Colorado, crush, fame, friends, humor, Iowa, junior high school, memoir, music, phlebotomist, relationships, sister, TV1 Comment

Carol grew up in in Pueblo, Colorado. They called it the little Pittsburg of the West. Her dad was a steelworker. Her mom was a lab tech phlebotomist at the hospital. Whenever one of the kids got sick, her mom would bring home a hypodermic needle in her purse to draw some blood. “To see… Continue reading Best Ed Sullivan Show Ever

The Bleeping Contractor’s Assistant

February 22, 2019February 22, 2019 Posted in chiropractor, contractor, humor, memoir, worsts1 Comment

The woman who works for me one day a week also works for my contractor. It’s actually how I found him. Here’s the problem. She/they keep moving my stuff around. Anyone who has ever done a kitchen knows what I mean. First they need to get out the sliding glass door to cut pipe. Never… Continue reading The Bleeping Contractor’s Assistant

The Red-tailed Hawk and the Toddler Fence

February 20, 2019February 20, 2019 Posted in birds, California, children, humor, hunting, Lindsay Wildlife Museum, memoir, Mount Diablo State Park, nature, outdoors, relationships, toddler, worst1 Comment

I am a bird lover. I feed the song birds and the finches. I have an ongoing water supply in the form of a fountain in my back yard. I’ve planted native plants for the hummingbirds. When I hike, I am thrilled to find a hawk feather to add to my hat. Twenty-odd years ago,… Continue reading The Red-tailed Hawk and the Toddler Fence

Pavlov’s Perfume

February 17, 2019February 17, 2019 Posted in animal adoption, animal rescue, animal shelter, ARF, Belgian Malinois, California, dogs, Houdini, humor, Jack Russell terrier, memoir, Pavlov, pet, relationships2 Comments

My girlfriend, who shall remain nameless, lest someone recognize her on this page, has a three-time rescue dog like me. Hers also started out as a voluntary surrender puppy after his owner first lost a home in the Redding fire. Or possibly he was at the Redding shelter and got shipped out to make room… Continue reading Pavlov’s Perfume

How to Train your Dog so He Won’t Bite You

February 15, 2019February 15, 2019 Posted in animal adoption, animal rescue, animal shelter, animal training, California, humor, memoir, pet, relationships, worstLeave a comment

Yesterday at the natural stone store where I went to look at their granite, the guy that helped me mentioned that his friend’s German Shepherd puppy kept biting his owner. Puppies do that because they are exploring their world. They are babies using everything as their personal teething rings. When my lab mix Pepper was… Continue reading How to Train your Dog so He Won’t Bite You

Drinking, Dancing and Driving

February 12, 2019March 20, 2019 Posted in California, dancing, drinking, DUI, girlfriends, memoir, police officer, relationshipsLeave a comment

I am a happy version of a designated driver. Instead of abstaining completely, I drink two glasses of wine per dancing event. I drink early and then stop. I do this for two reasons. #1 — I am a lightweight with alcohol. #2 — I need to drive friends that drink more than I do.… Continue reading Drinking, Dancing and Driving

To Dye or Not to Dye

February 10, 2019 Posted in aging, blondes, California, dancing, divorce, memoir, menopause, relationships, romanceLeave a comment

Driving to Monterey today, looking at the velvety green hills and the occasional sprinkles of white on the tallest ones, my mind started composing this blog post. I thought about how everyone in California dyes his or her hair – menopausal women (no surprise there), old guys, young women, teen-aged boys. Everyone, at least it… Continue reading To Dye or Not to Dye