last – Page 7 – FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER!

Jerky Jokester

July 23, 2019 Posted in California, cell phone, dumping someone, firsts, flirting, horse radish, humor, last, relationships, restaurant, worstLeave a comment

(re-run) Elena lived in the city. She went to the Cingular to get a phone line. Fidel saw her and helped her get one set up. She filled out the paperwork and then changed her mind. He put the paperwork into the shredder but then asked her for her phone number. “If you want it… Continue reading Jerky Jokester

On Guardian Angels

May 27, 2019 Posted in best, California, church, humor, last, memoir, nature, relationships, religion, worst3 Comments

A friend and I had a glass of wine together the other night and reflected back on our lives and the times we should have been died but didn’t. Some would call it luck. Others would call it having a guardian angel. Some would say that was a weird way to spend an evening. At… Continue reading On Guardian Angels

The Contractor and the Jet Setter

March 28, 2019March 28, 2019 Posted in best, California, cars, chemistry, firsts, high heels, humor, jet setter, last, meet and greet, relationships, travel1 Comment

It was Tom the contractor’s umpteenth date on Match.com. The woman was from the same affluent town, was the same height as he was (he was being optimistic and not counting the two inches he’d lost by aging), and was ready to meet him at Bridges, the hot spot downtown with the best happy hour. … Continue reading The Contractor and the Jet Setter

Bad Daisy, Rescue Dog

March 21, 2019March 21, 2019 Posted in animal adoption, animal rescue, animal training, ball launcher, dogs, firsts, Jack Russell terrier, last, memoir, relationships, Vizla, worstLeave a comment

Fifteen months into owning Daisy, the Jack Russell terrier, we had a bad event in the park just now. I taught Daisy how to fetch a ball and have been playing with her in the park next to my house every day for months. The neighbor girls, ages 5 and 7, run out to meet… Continue reading Bad Daisy, Rescue Dog

Butt Dials and Other My-Bads

March 13, 2019 Posted in Aspen, best, California, Colorado, humor, last, memoir, nerds, phone call, phone numbers, relationshipsLeave a comment

(re-run) I had lunch with my son today. We were trying to figure out why I’d used up all my storage on my cell phone. He took a look, handed back my phone, and watched me put it in my pocket. “You need to hit the button on the side and turn off your screen,”… Continue reading Butt Dials and Other My-Bads

Why Not to Date your Neighbor

March 12, 2019March 11, 2019 Posted in California, children, control freak, dating, divorce, dogs, firsts, humor, last, mom, moving, neighbors, relationships, restaurant, toys, worstLeave a comment

Julie got divorced and moved into her new townhouse with her six-year-old son. One day, when she was out walking her dog, a guy mowing his lawn turned off the mower and said hello. They chatted about her dog, and Julie mentioned that she had just moved in. Doug rode his bike a lot while… Continue reading Why Not to Date your Neighbor

If You Date your Neighbor

January 15, 2019 Posted in California, children, control freak, dating, divorce, dogs, firsts, humor, last, mom, moving, neighbors, relationships, restaurant, toys, worstLeave a comment

Porch Pirates, Poinsettias and Peaches

November 30, 2018December 30, 2018 Posted in animal adoption, best, board and care, burglaries, California, caregiver, holiday weekend, holidays, humor, last, memoir, neighbors, pet, relationships, Thanksgiving2 Comments

The joke going around social media is that if you want to get rid of your junk, put it in an Amazon box and leave it on your porch. It’s not that funny around my neighborhood. Porch pirates are everywhere this time of year. Neighbors are sure to tell each other when they will be… Continue reading Porch Pirates, Poinsettias and Peaches

Worst Boss Ever

November 25, 2018 Posted in boss, humor, Iowa, last, memoir, relationships, restaurant, summer, worstLeave a comment

Aside from the old-guy boss I had for ten days at the Iowa State Fair, who took one look at my giraffe legs in my short culottes jumper I’d made in sewing class and demanded that I bend over to see if my butt would show (it didn’t), George was the worst boss ever. George… Continue reading Worst Boss Ever

The Politics of Dating

November 15, 2018November 14, 2018 Posted in aging, attitude, best, border wall, California, dating, dinner, food, honesty, humor, last, memoir, misogynist, politics, president, racist, relationshipsLeave a comment

(Dialogue on a first date between senior man and senior woman) “You look nice.” “Sorry I am late.” “Let me tell you about my third wife.” “I have two dogs.” “I used to work on defense missiles.” “You must like to play video games.” “I like you.” “I am not a Republican, but I bet… Continue reading The Politics of Dating