As I stepped into the waiting room at my chiropractor’s office, three women and one guy were looking down at their cell phones, sitting in a symmetrical pattern in a u-shaped group of chairs. Feeling giddy from my 55 minute massage I said, “Well, this looks like a blog post to me! You’re all on… Continue reading Look Up! Get Some Face Time
Category: humor
To Smoke or Not to Smoke
My friend Kelly hasn’t smoked a cigarette for 75 days. After thirty-seven years of the puffing habit, she is proud of herself. Chantix helped. Wanting to quit helped more. Wanting better health and to be a good role model for her kids helped the most. Kelly craves a cigarette after finishing a meal. It’s a… Continue reading To Smoke or Not to Smoke
The Elusive Dot Dot Dot . . .
It takes seven artisans to make a glass of wine — from the grape grower to the vintner, to the cooper, etc. Or so the pitch goes at the small winery near Fairfield. And to draw a crowd, it brings in live music on weekend afternoons. Brent met a woman online and invited her to… Continue reading The Elusive Dot Dot Dot . . .
Bad Things Come in Small Packages
They met online on Okay Cupid. The horizontal happened fast. Things were going well, so after six months, Barry gave up his ugly apartment and bought a condo. She moved in right away. Then he started to notice her temper: 1. If the house wasn’t perfectly clean at all times. 2. If his son’s dog… Continue reading Bad Things Come in Small Packages
Hold the Crunch
Jim’s job was to put the crunch in the new peanut butter, Jif. One machine chopped the peanuts into slivers, and another machine used pistons to plug the slivers into the creamy product. Jim also had to taste test peanut butter that had been sitting on a shelf for three months in 100 degree heat.… Continue reading Hold the Crunch
Two Bird Baths, One Fountain
I love my yard. When I first bought my fixer house on a fixer third acre, the yard was full of rocks and rose bushes. Now it has trees, plants, bushes, flag stone, one fountain and two bird baths. The fountain is an advertisement to creatures near and far to come into my fenced yard.… Continue reading Two Bird Baths, One Fountain
The Double Dump
They’d met on Match. His name was Ready for Adventure. Larry chose a classy woman several weeks older than he was. “How does it feel to be a cougar?” he teased her. Julie liked nice things. She liked to dress up. Larry thought of her as the love of his life. He talked more than… Continue reading The Double Dump
Breaking Bad in Blackhawk
My right ear was plugged up, and I had a two hour rehearsal in front of me. I grabbed my chorus bag, my iced tea, some recycle bags and my jacket and headed out the door. I’ll stop at CVS on the way and pick up some Sudafed, so I can hear tonight. When I… Continue reading Breaking Bad in Blackhawk
Grabby Guy’s Goodness
Brenda was a grad student at Tufts in Boston. She was tired of dating and was thinking of getting her doctorate in nutrition after she got her Master’s degree. Brenda’s two roommates, who were also a couple, told Brenda she needed a night out to go dancing. Brenda got ready and then waited for them… Continue reading Grabby Guy’s Goodness
You Can Take the Girl Out of Iowa
At the end of my ten-week student teaching in Venezuela, one of the teachers said that I could probably come back to teach at Campo Alegre the following year. She said they were always looking for American teachers. “You can stay with me during the summer,” she said, “until you get your apartment.” The American… Continue reading You Can Take the Girl Out of Iowa
