Last week I took Sis to the hospital for a Barium Swallow test. We had just settled into the waiting room when an elderly woman with a cane came in the door. She had to go around Sis’s wheelchair to get to the check-in window. “Am I at the right place?” she asked no one… Continue reading Oh No! Not the Dubs!
Category: firsts
Asparagus, Anyone?
The farmhouse was next to the highway, close enough for me to hear the train come by every night, and far enough away from the tracks to get used to sleeping through it. No houses could be seen from any window — just trees, sky, and lots of cornfields. It was a peaceful place, sometimes… Continue reading Asparagus, Anyone?
Don’t Stand Up!
It was a long train ride from Lima to Cuzco, or maybe it was from Cuzco to Machu Picchu. At any rate, I was on a train with a bunch of Peruvians and my roommate, Kristy. Trains give me motion sickness, as do boats, cars, planes, swings, and carnival rides. It’s a miracle that I’ve… Continue reading Don’t Stand Up!
The Navy Guy and the Babe Mobile
Bruce was a lieutenant in the navy, and he lived with four bachelor roommates. They’d been out to sea for six months and were back for six months. A guy could save up a lot of money in six months, so Bruce was able to buy a silver Jaguar XKE convertible. He nicknamed it his… Continue reading The Navy Guy and the Babe Mobile
DUI Date
Lesley was a college freshman at UOP in Stockton when a big football player type guy asked her on a date. Lesley had already met his roommate, so she thought she was safe with Chad and said yes. Chad took Lesley to a party, but when his roommate came up to say hi to Lesley,… Continue reading DUI Date
Romance Coast to Coast
Nicky went back to Connecticut to see his mother. “You’ve got to meet this cute Italian girl working in my office,” a friend said. “I’m only here for a week,” Nicky said. “My wife is in night class with a cute Italian girl,” another friend said. “You two should meet.” “I’m only here for a… Continue reading Romance Coast to Coast
Having his Cake
We sat at the bar at Il Vecchio’s next to the guy with the shaved head. My girlfriend chatted him up while we waited for a table. We decided to have dinner at the bar. Adam was cute enough but not too tall. He seemed interested in my petite girlfriend, so at the end of… Continue reading Having his Cake
Grindr Getaway
How does a sixty-year-old woman find out about an app called Grindr for gay guys? She asks her local millennial cocktail waitress at an upscale bar for a worst date story. Her waitress just happens to know her younger brother’s worst first story and tells it to her for a better tip. Here it is.… Continue reading Grindr Getaway
To Smoke or Not to Smoke
My friend Kelly hasn’t smoked a cigarette for 75 days. After thirty-seven years of the puffing habit, she is proud of herself. Chantix helped. Wanting to quit helped more. Wanting better health and to be a good role model for her kids helped the most. Kelly craves a cigarette after finishing a meal. It’s a… Continue reading To Smoke or Not to Smoke
Designer Dogs, 200th Post
As I watch the end of the Oscars with a little dog cozied up in the chair with me and my sister asking when she can go to bed, I think back on the man I met the other night, the one who wants to get a Doodle Dane, a cross breed between a Great… Continue reading Designer Dogs, 200th Post
FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER! 