Every woman over fifty gets the same advice from her hairdresser — lighten up your hair. As our skin fades and our looks do, too, we need brighter lipstick, sparkly-er clothing and blonder locks to stay looking as young as we can. My apologies to women of color; this may not apply to you. So… Continue reading The Blond-tourage
Category: humor
At Face Value
Mark was a good-looking bartender at an upscale restaurant, and full of confidence. He’d say his face was his moneymaker and that you need to use what your mama gave you. Mark went onto Bumble to find a date. He waited until a woman messaged him (that’s how Bumble works). Her photo showed a good-looking… Continue reading At Face Value
Dance with Me, Young Jeremy
Each dance bar in Omaha ended the night with its signature song. One bar closed with Last Dance by Donna Summer, another used Shout from the Blues Brothers movie (by the Isley Brothers) as its sign-off song. But my fave dance bar closed with the song New York, New York. It seemed an odd choice… Continue reading Dance with Me, Young Jeremy
Waitresses Make the Best Tippers
After moving to Omaha and teaching for a couple of years across the Missouri River in Council Bluffs, Iowa, I grew tired of driving a car that smelled like a mildewed basement. My poor Chevy Monza had suffered through a Nebraska flood back at the farmhouse, and the car stank. I couldn’t afford a new… Continue reading Waitresses Make the Best Tippers
Bricks, Ricks, & Cardboard
The college mixer was hosted by the men in Lorch House in Friley Hall, in the heart of the Iowa State campus. Tappan House, the top two floors of my dorm, Barton Hall, was invited. Yes, I am old. Yes, dorm floors are co-ed now. This was in the days of the dinosaurs. The usual… Continue reading Bricks, Ricks, & Cardboard
Bricks, Ricks, & Cardboard
The college mixer was hosted by the men in Lorch House in Friley Hall, in the heart of the Iowa State campus. Tappan House, the top two floors of my dorm, Barton Hall, was invited. Yes, I am old. Yes, dorm floors are co-ed now. This was in the days of the dinosaurs. The usual… Continue reading Bricks, Ricks, & Cardboard
Rocky Mountain Low
(re-run) He was the good-looking cousin of my best friend. Tall, tan, and bearded, with a killer smile, it was love at first sight. Marcus had moved from Minnesota to Colorado to be near his sister. He asked if I wanted to come out and go backpacking with him. I said yes but that my… Continue reading Rocky Mountain Low
Teddy Bear with Back Hair
When I lived in Omaha for eight years in my twenties, I dated almost all the eligible men I met in my age range, at least once — shorter guys, smokers, non-dancers, younger guys, poorer guys (I was a school teacher!) and guys with facial hair. But I NEVER dated a guy with back hair… Continue reading Teddy Bear with Back Hair
Julie Takes a Ride
(re-run) Julie and her friend, Denise, went to the Rusty Pelican on Friday night. It was their go-to hang-out. But lately it had been heavy on girls’ night-out groups and light on eligible men. Would it be the same old, same old kind of night, or would Julie finally meet a datable man? She’d fluffed… Continue reading Julie Takes a Ride
It’s a Jungle Out There
(re-run) I saw a coyote yesterday during my strength and training class at the senior center. There are so many people in the drop-in class that I have to stand right in front of the glass doors, with a view of the hills filled with wild turkeys, birds, and now Wiley Coyote. My back hurts… Continue reading It’s a Jungle Out There
