She seemed normal enough. James met her on the softball diamond — he was playing, shortstop, she played second base. It was a singles club event for Labor Day. He wasn’t an actual member but showed up on the holidays. Beth was sort of cute, her body pretty good for fifty plus. He was also… Continue reading The Cat Lady
Afternoon Delight: Read All About It
(The Worst Wait for a Date) If you were in eighth grade and you had a weekly afternoon paper route delivering the Detroit News in Saginaw, Michigan, and you rode your red Schwinn bicycle with the basket to do your route and then rode it again on collection day, what would your fantasy be? If… Continue reading Afternoon Delight: Read All About It
Do the Hustle
Guido met Marsha at a famous bar called Rex and Eric’s in Waikiki. He lived locally. She was on vacation. He’d put on his five gold chains, unbuttoned his billowy polyester shirt with the big collar to reveal just enough chest hair, stepped into a pair of black high-waisted pants that hugged his tight butt,… Continue reading Do the Hustle
Leroy, the Farmer Boy
It was a Saturday night and the dorm floor was deserted. Everyone was off doing something fun. Ellie sat at her desk trying to study Biology 101, but she wasn’t feeling it. A dorm mate burst in and asked her if she wanted to go on a double date right then and there, to a… Continue reading Leroy, the Farmer Boy
Why So Many First Worsts
In scrounging around for a first-worst-date story this week (after all, I’ve already done my own dates from Ames, Omaha, and Walnut Creek – how many first-worsts can one person have?), I discovered something. I hate some of my friends, the ones who’ve never had a bad date, ever. First there is Jim, whom I… Continue reading Why So Many First Worsts
Late-night Loser
We decided to meet at Bing Crosby’s. I took a seat at the bar, and asked for water. After all, I’d had two glasses of wine already, waiting for him to get off work at the TV station and to drive all the way to Walnut Creek from Marin County. I listened to the jazz… Continue reading Late-night Loser
Fly Boy Fail
Offutt Airforce Base is just outside of Omaha. You could spot an air force guy anywhere in town because of his close haircut, back in the day of long-haired hippie dudes. A clean-cut guy in a uniform worked for a lot of women, and I was no exception. We met at a dance bar, and… Continue reading Fly Boy Fail
Worst “On Her Way to a Date”
She wanted to surprise him. They had both left Hawaii at different times to go home for Christmas and would meet up that night when he picked her up from the airport. He liked lingerie. She had bought a new thong for the holidays, red on one side, green on the other, with two tiny… Continue reading Worst “On Her Way to a Date”
Five Minutes in Philly
She was tall and blond. He was taller and had reddish hair. They were both at Rite Aid in Valley Forge. Matthew had come in for his hair gel, LA Look, to maintain his spiked hair. He saw her in aisle 12. “I have trouble finding hair products for men,” he said, testing the waters.… Continue reading Five Minutes in Philly
Dance with Me, Young Jeremy
Each dance bar in Omaha ended the night with its signature song. One bar closed with Last Dance by Donna Summer, another used Shout from the Blues Brothers movie (by the Isley Brothers) as its sign-off song. But my fave dance bar closed with the song New York, New York. It seemed an odd choice… Continue reading Dance with Me, Young Jeremy
FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER! 