She was under a rusted-out Ford pick-up truck that looked as though it had been parked there for decades. Her sister was an ugly black and white Australian blue heeler/Brittany spaniel mix. She wasn’t much prettier. “Are you sure you want that one?” my future husband asked. I looked at the black spot on top… Continue reading Best Dog, Worst Dog
Category: humor
Black Lights and Beatles
You know that one song that whenever you hear it, it takes you back to a time and place when you were doing something so memorable, while it was playing in the background, that it is burned into your brain for eternity? We’d seen the guys at the Iowa State Fair the summer before, where… Continue reading Black Lights and Beatles
Prince Not So Charming
He was dressed as a prince in his puffy sleeved blouse and velvet jacket. I was dressed as a 1930’s nurse from Samuel Merritt Nursing School in Oakland. Admittedly it was a weird Halloween costume, but the woman at the estate sale had practically given it to me after I bought $200 worth of antiques… Continue reading Prince Not So Charming
Waitresses Make the Best Tippers
After moving to Omaha and teaching for a couple of years across the Missouri River in Council Bluffs, Iowa, I grew tired of driving a car that smelled like a mildewed basement. My poor Chevy Monza had suffered through a Nebraska flood back at the farmhouse, and the car stank. I couldn’t afford a new… Continue reading Waitresses Make the Best Tippers
Worst Weekend Getaway Ever
While student teaching in Venezuela, we learned how to have fun with not much money. One of the American teachers had stolen a couple of striped beach towels from an upscale hotel, and she had been sneaking into the hotel pool for years. “Just carry the towel and act like you belong,” Linda said. Christy… Continue reading Worst Weekend Getaway Ever
Rocky Mountain Low
He was the good-looking cousin of my best friend. Tall, tan, and bearded, with a killer smile, it was love at first sight. Marcus had moved from Minnesota to Colorado to be near his sister. He asked if I wanted to come out and go backpacking with him. I said yes but that my girlfriend… Continue reading Rocky Mountain Low
The Cat Lady
She seemed normal enough. James met her on the softball diamond — he was playing, shortstop, she played second base. It was a singles club event for Labor Day. He wasn’t an actual member but showed up on the holidays. Beth was sort of cute, her body pretty good for fifty plus. He was also… Continue reading The Cat Lady
Do the Hustle
Guido met Marsha at a famous bar called Rex and Eric’s in Waikiki. He lived locally. She was on vacation. He’d put on his five gold chains, unbuttoned his billowy polyester shirt with the big collar to reveal just enough chest hair, stepped into a pair of black high-waisted pants that hugged his tight butt,… Continue reading Do the Hustle
Why So Many First Worsts
In scrounging around for a first-worst-date story this week (after all, I’ve already done my own dates from Ames, Omaha, and Walnut Creek – how many first-worsts can one person have?), I discovered something. I hate some of my friends, the ones who’ve never had a bad date, ever. First there is Jim, whom I… Continue reading Why So Many First Worsts
Worst “On Her Way to a Date”
She wanted to surprise him. They had both left Hawaii at different times to go home for Christmas and would meet up that night when he picked her up from the airport. He liked lingerie. She had bought a new thong for the holidays, red on one side, green on the other, with two tiny… Continue reading Worst “On Her Way to a Date”
