How does a sixty-year-old woman find out about an app called Grindr for gay guys? She asks her local millennial cocktail waitress at an upscale bar for a worst date story. Her waitress just happens to know her younger brother’s worst first story and tells it to her for a better tip. Here it is.… Continue reading Grindr Getaway
Category: Iowa
Me Too
He was one of five professors in the tiny Spanish department at Iowa State. I had him for both semesters of Spanish Two, and I’d just landed a summer job, selling books door to door in a mystery state after a week’s training in Nashville. The bus for me and the other recruits was leaving… Continue reading Me Too
Best Dog, Worst Dog
She was under a rusted-out Ford pick-up truck that looked as though it had been parked there for decades. Her sister was an ugly black and white Australian blue heeler/Brittany spaniel mix. She wasn’t much prettier. “Are you sure you want that one?” my future husband asked. I looked at the black spot on top… Continue reading Best Dog, Worst Dog
First Boss, Worst Boss
Aside from the old-man boss I had at my ten-day job at the Iowa State Fair, who took one look at my giraffe legs in my short culotte jumper I’d made in sewing class and demanded that I bend over to see if my butt would show (it didn’t), George was the worst boss ever.… Continue reading First Boss, Worst Boss
Football Game Fail
Betty had first seen Dwayne at the hockey game, sitting by himself, drinking a beer. Her friends commented that he looked like Richard Geer. She made an effort to strike up a conversation with him. He turned out to be a teacher and a farmer in a small town outside of Des Moines. He was… Continue reading Football Game Fail
Wrestlers and Basketball Dudes
The summer after high school graduation Debi, Donna, and I climbed into Debi’s blue Ford Pinto and cruised over to the next town of Johnston. Why? New guys, of course, not the same old, same old Urbandale guys. Debi was petite, Donna a little taller, and I was a giraffe. We made an odd trio… Continue reading Wrestlers and Basketball Dudes
Easy Rider
My neighbor, Joan, would roll her parents’ car out of the garage when we were in 9th grade so we could go driving in the middle of the night during her slumber parties. We’d fall into fits of hysterical laughter when Mr. Bast, the milkman, would go by in his milk truck. But we didn’t… Continue reading Easy Rider
Why So Many First Worsts
In scrounging around for a first-worst-date story this week (after all, I’ve already done my own dates from Ames, Omaha, and Walnut Creek – how many first-worsts can one person have?), I discovered something. I hate some of my friends, the ones who’ve never had a bad date, ever. First there is Jim, whom I… Continue reading Why So Many First Worsts
Total Eclipse of the Date
The last solar eclipse over the continental U.S. was on Monday, February 26, 1979. Claudette worked in the x-ray department at Lutheran Hospital in Des Moines, Iowa. She and her co-workers took some x-ray film and went outside to look at the sun through the film. They were not in the path of totality (had… Continue reading Total Eclipse of the Date
Bricks, Ricks, & Cardboard
The college mixer was hosted by the men in Lorch House in Friley Hall, in the heart of the Iowa State campus. Tappan House, the top two floors of my dorm, Barton Hall, was invited. Yes, I am old. Yes, dorm floors are co-ed now. This was in the days of the dinosaurs. The usual… Continue reading Bricks, Ricks, & Cardboard
