(re-run) A spring wedding means pastel colors and floral prints, right? But what if it’s still raining on the wedding day? And what if you have to walk up to the altar, turn to face the crowd, and then need to read a poem without tripping or falling over? For me, that means wearing the… Continue reading B is for Boots
Category: humor
Nature’s Prayer Moment
(re-run) Yesterday morning I stepped up to the kitchen sink to fill the tea pot and looked out my window at the flowers exploding in my yard. I glanced over to the fountain where I saw dozens of identical birds taking drinks in a clumped up circle around the top of my round fountain. Their… Continue reading Nature’s Prayer Moment
Fluorescent Man at the Wine Festival
(re-run) Today the town up one freeway (and over another freeway) had a wine festival. My art friend was showing her work, so we agreed to meet for lunch when she was done. A guy friend wanted to dance at 5:00 to the Spazmatics. I got the dogs done early, visited my sis, and then… Continue reading Fluorescent Man at the Wine Festival
Three Strikes, You’re Out
(re-run) He didn’t seem her usual type. He was a few pounds overweight, but not bad looking, and he wore a nice suit in his online photo. He was an architect. He pursued her with photo-likes over a few weeks and text messages, too. Kate agreed to a phone chat. At least he seems intelligent.… Continue reading Three Strikes, You’re Out
The Blond-tourage
(re-run) Every woman over fifty gets the same advice from her hairdresser — lighten up your hair. As our skin fades and our looks do, too, we need brighter lipstick, sparkly-er clothing and blonder locks to stay looking as young as we can. My apologies to women of color; this may not apply to you.… Continue reading The Blond-tourage
Bad Things that Come in Small Packages
(re-run) They met online on okcupid. The horizontal happened fast. Things were going well, so after six months, Barry gave up his ugly apartment and bought a condo. She moved in right away. Then he started to notice her temper: 1. If the house wasn’t perfectly clean at all times. 2. If his son’s dog… Continue reading Bad Things that Come in Small Packages
Oh No, Not the Warriors!
(re-run from 2019?) Last week I took Sis to the hospital for a Barium Swallow test. We had just settled into the waiting room when an elderly woman with a cane came in the door. She had to go around Sis’s wheelchair to get to the check-in window. “Am I at the right place?” she… Continue reading Oh No, Not the Warriors!
My Fake-Coffee Half Hour
(re-run) It’s funny how a person’s perception of what is good changes with the circumstances. I used to look forward to my can of Diet Coke every day until I reached my mid-forties. Then the stuff became too hard on my stomach, and I gave it up. I used to look forward to my cup… Continue reading My Fake-Coffee Half Hour
A Funeral, an Appendix, and a Dead Concert
(re-run) PK lived in Jersey when her childhood friend’s mum was terminally ill in Boston. Her friend called to say her mother had died, and PK woke up, wanting to go to the funeral and surprise her friend. She felt bad but thought it was the heat. She loaded up her three-year-old daughter and took… Continue reading A Funeral, an Appendix, and a Dead Concert
At Face Value
(re-run) Mark was a good-looking bartender, full of confidence, at an upscale restaurant. He’d say his face was his moneymaker and that you need to use what your mama gave you. Mark went onto Bumble to find a date. He waited until a woman messaged him (that’s how Bumble works). Her photo showed a good-looking… Continue reading At Face Value
FIRST DATE, WORST DATE EVER! 