OCD Dreams


I often dream about finding a public bathroom to use right before I wake up. It’s because I have to pee.

Two nights ago I dreamed I was in a crowded restaurant and when I went into the bathroom, there were tables in there with groups of women seated around them. I stood at the sink looking back at them from the mirror.  Sometimes the bathrooms are co-ed, and many times there are no doors or low doors. What does it all mean?

I think it means get up, you have to pee.

I used to have scary water dreams where I was trying to cross a rushing river, usually with babies in my arms, and after my sis moved in, while pushing a wheelchair. I haven’t had that one for a while.

Near the end of my marriage, I’d dream I was trapped in a room with a high ceiling, and the only exit was through a small hole in the wall at the top.  The hole was very small, and I had to traverse a wooden bridge or an iron bar to get to the hole, or air. I never got out of the room in my dream.

I often lose my friends or family in the dream, and I spend the rest of it trying to find them.

Another recurring dream is driving on a bridge that climbs into the sky and then stops, as in, it isn’t finished and you could drive off the edge. I don’t know why I have such weird dreams, but maybe it has something to do with OCD.

OCD is obsessive compulsive disorder, where your brain tells you to do compulsive things, like constant hand-washing, to help with your obsessive thoughts, like driving off the edge of a bridge. I told my sis once that I had it, and she said, “No, you don’t.”

Really, are you inside my head with me?

I have never taken meds for my OCD, but by now it’s a good friend. Whenever I get those obsessive thoughts, I remind myself, oh, it’s just your OCD.  It does come in handy, though, when all your friends are doing something stupid in high school, and you don’t participate because it’s well, stupid.

Like getting drunk and riding down the spillway on an inner tube in the dark in the middle of nowhere.

Or riding with a guy who shows off and guns it to 100 miles per hour on city streets.

Or riding on the back of a motorcycle.

Or running with the bulls in Pamplona, Spain. The two guys in our study-abroad group that did it survived, but I was worried for them the whole time.

As a teacher, I’d have the dreams where you are teaching a class and you look down and you forgot to get dressed. Or all your students are your friends, not children. Or you were supposed to give the kids a test, but you forgot it. Or you get there late. Or you forgot to prepare.

Children have better dreams, about candy or Disneyland, or getting presents. The best dreams are the flying ones. I haven’t had one of those dreams in a long time.

I often write whole stories in my dreams and then wake up and go, “Darn! I can’t remember! But it was a good one.”

Or I dream about music and sing songs that I don’t know the lyrics to the minute I am awake.

I’ll dream about my dad as though he is still on this earth and then wake up and think, Oh. Hi, Dad. Was that really you?

I’ve dreamed about old pets, ex husbands, and friends I haven’t seen for years. They show up, and the next day I take note that I owe them a phone call, or at least a Facebook message.

Dreaming helps the brain rest up.  Some people say they never dream. I dream in color with stereo surround sound and foreign women watching me wash my hands in the ladies’ room as they nosh on their breakfast.

Couldda Wouldda Shouldda

I should keep a pad of paper next to my bed, so I can jot down my dream before I get up.






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