I’m a creature of habit. If it’s Monday, then it’s exercise with Carolyn at 9:30. If it’s Tuesday it’s chorus at 7:00 p.m.. If it’s Wednesday, it’s exercise with Milan at 9:30. If it’s Thursday it’s Wild Card day. If it’s Friday, it’s exercise with Yuko at 9:30.
Only this week things were goofed up. Wild Card Thursday got sucked up with a doctor’s appointment and a pharmacy run for my sis. Friday had a family brunch for a visiting adult child of mine, which preempted exercise class. It took the rest of the day for me to get back on track. Everything felt wrong, like I was in the wrong place all day long.
I am a planner. I like structure. When my schedule is jostled, I am jostled. I’ve always been this way. I have accepted it as who I am. It’s too late to change me.
The weekend is planned down to the hour. I know that makes me the opposite of spontaneous. It’s okay. I like to know where I am supposed to be and what I am supposed to be doing to get through the weekend. Don’t get me wrong. I will have a good time. I’ve only planned things that I like to do. It’s the dread of a free weekend afternoon with no plans and no prospect that makes me crazy. It’s FOMO. I don’t want to miss out on stuff.
I factor in the visit to my sis. Every day she asks me when I am coming back. Every day, I say, “Tomorrow.”
“What time?” she asks.
I can usually make an intelligent guess as to when I will return.
Tomorrow it will be early, after I walk the dogs but before I meet a friend for lunch and music at a local wine festival. Then I meet another friend at the same festival for some dancing. Then I meet some more friends at an 8 o’clock show. It will be a full day. I think I have over-planned.
Sunday will be equally fun and not as tightly structured.
The upcoming week has something every single day — doctor’s appointments, parties, live music, a hike. I can’t do it all. I need to see how each day goes and how much I can actually get done. I might be too tired to hear music. It might be too hot to hike. The doctor appointment might run too late and screw up the live music. I might need to go out of town for two days. My usual Sunday-Monday out of town trips won’t work this week. I need to be here for chorus. That means the trip will have to come after that. Things will get cancelled. Oh, well.
I need a vacation from my life. I need a week to do whatever I want with no structure and no schedule.
Wait! I don’t think I would like that too much.
Maybe that’s why I haven’t taken one in more than two years. I need a tour group vacation where I just show up and follow the itinerary.