Bowl Highlights

Yes, the game was exciting. Yes, the underdogs won. Yes, it was a high-scoring game with many firsts: most total yards in Super Bowl history, gutsiest play in Super Bowl history, highest loser score in Super Bowl history.
I could’ve done something more educational and important. But those commercials! So funny or so sincere. Every big company in America had to get a piece of the action: Amazon, Kia, Jeep, Toyota, RAM, Lexus, Michelob, Budweiser, Tide, Persil (?), Verizon, T Mobile, Kraft, Groupon, Mucinex, Universal Studios, the Olympics, movie trailers, and wix.com., a website building company (I may have missed a few).
And for once, I could hear what they were saying. The best commercial quotes are as follows:
“Someone needs attention!”
“The chips are outside!”
“Chris Pratt.”
“This isn’t a movie. It’s a tourism ad for Australia.”
“What was in those brownies?”
“Join me in thanking first responders.”
“They answer the call.”
“Show-off!”
“How do you like it now, my friend?”
“Dream on.”
“Be celebrated, not tolerated.”
“Change starts now.”
“Today’s that day to take that step.”
“Do what you do. Family how you family.”
“What are you going to do, Martha? Tuck me in bed and read me a cookbook?”
“I wonder if they can conjure me up a boyfriend.”
“Clean water at the turn of the tap.”
“The off season is on.”
“Family-owned? Shut it down.”
“Enjoy your sick day.”
You can pretty much match up the quotation to the company.
The Alexa commercials were the best, tied with the Dirty Dancing commercial and the avocado commercial about a dystopian world with no chips.
This was the first year I watched the game at home with one other person and two dogs instead of at a house party. Last year’s party had a family room half the size of my house (and seventy-five potluck items).
My sister, who is 65, has NEVER watched the Super Bowl in her life until today. She’s missed it fifty-one times. I explained to her that this is the only football game I watch every year and that it is way more than football. It is million-dollar commercials plus the half-time show. It’s knowing the inside-jokes around the water cooler the next morning.
Our mother doesn’t watch it. Many on Facebook don’t watch it. I used to boycott it with an old boyfriend who believed sporting events are a form of mind control for the masses. Maybe they are. I am sure millions of people dedicated almost four hours of their time to the game today. Some of them came for the food or the celebrities. Others watched the game and questioned every referee call. Others heard it as background noise as they partied.
I hope you saw some of the ads for the biggest American companies. Most were funny or hopeful. I didn’t understand a couple of them. I hope you recognized at least one of Justin Timberlake’s songs during the half-time show and tapped your toes to Can’t Stop the Feeling.
If not, you’d better tune in next year to the Grammy Awards, the Golden Globes, and SAG Awards, or the Academy Awards coming up at the end of February.
No, it’s not educational. But it’s cultural, it’s American, it’s fun, especially when you get to explain it all to your sister, the rookie.

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