Hogwash!

When working on a manuscript for a woman born two centuries ago, I needed an old-timey synonym for hogwash. I Googled it and found a website called Power Thesaurus with 517 choices. I really didn’t want that many.
As I perused the first page, my choices were rubbish, balderdash, bunk, and drivel, along with baloney, hooey, malarkey and poppycock.
I wasn’t sure, so I looked at page two: gobbledegook, gibberish, hokum and hot air, also horse shit, tommy-rot, flapdoodle and codswallop.
Page three: horse feathers, mumbo jumbo, fiddle-faddle and blather.
Are you exhausted yet, because I am. Sometimes there can be too many choices.
I’d like three to five choices, tops. It’s easy to narrow them down when there are no more than five.
It’s the same when choosing a rescue dog, a restaurant, or a movie. Too many choices make it overwhelming. People freeze up and can’t decide. With five, you can decide.
Or shirts to wear, cars to drive, shows to watch, or guys to date. I’ve never gone on online dating sites, but I imagine it must be overwhelming.
Dinners to cook, cakes to bake, wines to drink, loads of laundry to wash, or rose bushes to trim. Everything in moderation, please.
Just for grins, I looked at the last page of the synonym site. The choices were losing quality. The last page had tittle tattle, taradiddle, weasel words, and yap for words meaning hogwash.
I couldn’t imagine the woman in my story saying weasel words!
Google is great, and I am sure online dating sites are great.
But I don’t need 517 choices.

Couldda Wouldda Shouldda

I shoud’ve used my brain and chosen poppycock.

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